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Hello world! I am really new to this so forgive me for any nonsense that may occur. I should also warn you that I am NOT a great writer. Take it for what it's worth and please don't correct me, I already know enough.
Well how do I start this thing? Maybe I should talk about me a little to warm you all up. I am a 27 year old female living in the Midwest. I know, it sounds really exciting. I am not married, but I do live with my boy. He's 37, old, but funny, and really cute. I hate my job, love my friends, and tolerate my family.
Well that will give you all the basic idea for now I suppose.
I'm not sure why I decided to start this blog, but I think that deep down I just want to vent sometimes and not have to face the consequences. Sometimes I want to say how much I hate people, but the fear of being shot dead scares the crap out of me, so a lot of the times I keep my trap shut. I never want to, but I do. So, anyway here I am more than ready to offend the masses with my honest outlook on life.
I am at work right now, bored to tears, wishing I could win the lottery. I come to work at 8am Monday-Friday, work until 8:30ish and then I'm usually done for the day. The rest of the day I get to listen to my boss make every annoying sound that can possibly come out of the human(?) body. Seriously, this guy is such a freak that I can't stand to even look at him sometimes because I want to do the fucking River Dance on his face. Don't get me wrong, he's a very nice guy, but just very obnoxious. I'm sure that I will have many stories to share as time goes by, but here are a few brief tidbits.
1. He shits about 15 times a day. Now that is one thing but there's more, when he shits 15 times a day, he uses, oh, I'd guess, half of a can of air freshener. He actually sprays it on himself. When he comes back into the office I can't breathe. It is horrible, cinnamon, yay.
2. He likes to psyche people out before he calls them, so he picks up the phone (on speakerphone) approximately 3 times before he calls them. He will listen to the dial tone for 5-10 seconds and then hang up. Repeat. Repeat. He just sits there staring off into space listening to the tone. What a freak. I want to punch him in the face. These are just a few, but I will have more than enough stories to tell.
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